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Mom said, “Happy birthday” and walked out of my room.I smiled at my mother all day long and then my f******n-year-old birthday party started. It s...emed strange that just my parents, Mom’s sister, and Dad’s two sisters were the only guests.Dad kept going out back to tend to the barbecue. We were having chicken and Dad was trying to cook them like the local fire department does. So every few minutes he came in to check on us and then run right back out.Meanwhile, whenever Dad was not in the. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct.Not more than five minutes later, I heard herReporting to the rest of the family that he hadDied of a ‘massive internal fart.’Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg4. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, ‘How long have you been bedridden?’After a look of complete confusion she answered...‘ Why, not for about twenty years - when. ’s caneMorbid: Higher offerNitrates: Higher rates of pay for working nights rather than daysNode: I knew itOutpatient: a person who has faintedPost Operative: A letter carrierRecovery Room: a place to do UpholsteryRectum: Nearly killed himSecretion: Hiding somethingSeizure: A roman emperorTerminal Illness: Getting sick at AirportTumor: one plus one moreUrine: Opposite of you’re outThe following is compliments of smokeyjoeAllegedly, while taxiing at London Gatwick Airport, the crew of a US Air. But that didn't make her father stop, he spat insults and hurled abuse. Only to try sweet talk her a few minutes later. As if all his 'I'm sorry pet' and baby talk would heal her. That was her life. Aching, tired and lonely, Lily longed for a rest. She considered just giving up and collapsing on the side of the road. But she didn't want to be picked up by strangers. So she wandered on until she spotted a barn from the road. It was old, but looked safe enough. No lights nearby, and and old.
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